With Valentine’s Day slowly approaching I thought what a better time to talk about loneliness and loving yourself. Today we are going to discuss loneliness. My next post will be about loving yourself. As you know, social media is taking over the world lol. I am so addicted to Instagram its not even funny. But I noticed so many people on there talking about how lonely they are and how Valentine’s Day is going to suck and how they want love. I can’t help but think about myself, “Was I that bad??” Answer: Yes, I was.
Not too long ago I used to be a girl that wanted to be loved. I loved everything about love. I loved seeing people in love; seeing people happy; just the whole thought of love made my heart warm and fuzzy. I wanted it. So I talked to God and I asked, “God how is it that I want it but don’t have it? I’m tired of feeling lonely. When is my time going to come?” God replied, “Because you don’t know Me. You don’t love yourself the way that you should. You look and you search for love everywhere else but yet you overlook the one person who loves you most, who loved you first.” The tears begin to flow. God just put me in check. I was told, “It’s better to be corrected in private and get it right than to be corrected harshly in public.” I made up my mind that night that I was going to love me more, I was going to build a relationship with God, and I was going to fall head over heels in love with Him. I was going to trust Him like never before and allow Him to have control of my life and my heart.
That was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made :)
God wants to show so many of us the unconditional love that we so desire. He doesn’t want us to feel loveless or lonely. What we must understand is that God will separate us from anything in our life that we are dependent on other than Him! Heather Lindsey says, “Loneliness comes when you develop a need for others.” We sometimes need validation or even seek guidance from the people around us more so than the God who created us, the one that knows us best. Whenever we are feeling lonely that’s Gods way of calling us back to Him. That’s the great thing about God. We may not see or understand why God does some of the things He does but, it’s all for a purpose. So yes some of those relationships have to go. Some of those friendships have to die. God wants us to draw nearer to Him. He longs for a deeper communion with us. His arms are wide open and He’s waiting to love you. How do I know this? He did it for me. He showed me more love than I had ever imagined. God loves you like crazy and He wants the best for you. So rest and know that God will never leave you nor forsake you.
Food for thought:
A lot of times we aren’t aware that what we put into our hearts (music, TV shows, social media, etc.) are the main causes that’s pulling us into feeling “lonely” (Proverbs 4:23). So here are some little points on how to shut your emotions up.
1. Turn off the sad love songs! Don’t get me wrong now, I love me some Monica /Slow Jams Pandora station just like anybody else BUT, whenever I am feeling down and out I do NOT play any of that. Why? Because those people go on and on about how sad they are and how hurt they are for what, 4:00 minutes at the most? You have just set a depressing atmosphere for yourself my dear. Cut it off, Get OUT of your feelings, and into your word! Try listening to Tasha Cobbs (love her), Tashawn Mitchell, Kierra Sheard something uplifting.
2. Be content! (Philippians 4:11) Stop looking at all these celebrity couples on TV and on Instagram and thinking, “Hey I want that.” I am so guilty of that. Don’t get me wrong it’s nothing wrong with admiring but want what God has for you. We have got to be content and thankful for the state that we are in. We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors in their lives. We don’t see their struggles. We cannot RUSH GOD!! Cause let me tell you, I rushed God one time. Prayed and prayed for something and when HE gave it to me (Cause God gives us what we ask for) I was praying for Him to take it back. I had no peace. I’m saying all this to say stop trying to have God alter your life on the things you want rather than the things you need
Love Always,
Zanda
P.S
By no reason am I looking down on anybody or pointing the finger. I too have lonely days. Know that everything that I write I have been through it or going through it :) Just wanted to make that part clear
